Ah, bonjour, mes amis! Mathieu Brousseau-Tremblay here, and I'm still trying to wipe the sleep from my eyes with a double espresso, but then I see this... *this*. No but listen, listen. You know when you're walking down Saint-Laurent, maybe you just grabbed a smoked meat sandwich chez Schwartz's, and someone breezes past you on a Bixi, talking at full volume into their phone, holding it straight out in front of them like it's a microphone? We all wonder, right? *Why* are they doing that? Your phone still functions when held to your ear, people! It's a mystery, non?
But this, what I just read, it makes the speakerphone phenomenon seem like... well, like someone just forgot their etiquette at home. Because apparently, we have AI chatbots out there – these supposedly smart, cutting-edge programs – that are confidently recommending "rectal garlic insertion for immune support." *Ben voyons!* Rectal garlic! For *immune support*! C'est n'importe quoi! You know, sometimes I walk through Marché Jean-Talon, and the smell of fresh garlic is just divine, especially for a good pesto or a proper spaghetti sauce, but you don't hear anyone at the depanneur recommending it *that* way for your health, hein? This isn't some old-wives' tale from your grand-mère, this is a *chatbot* being seduced by medical misinformation. Imagine asking for advice on a headache and it tells you to go put a bagel up your nose. A St-Viateur bagel, no less! C'est Montréal, mon ami — bonne chance trying to explain it, but *this*… this is beyond even our wildest Plateau-style eccentricities.
I mean, if this is the future, I think I'll stick to actual doctors, or at least a nice hot tisane when I feel a cold coming on. Or maybe I'll just go for a walk in Parc Lafontaine. Anything but… *that*. Bon, it’s going to be a long day, mes amis.