Alright, listen—listen—LISTEN. I'm seeing "TSA wait times Atlanta" trending. Atlanta. Hartsfield-Jackson. Folks. People. We've been through this. This isn't a new phenomenon. This isn't a surprise snowstorm in Georgia where everyone forgets how to drive. This is Atlanta, in 2026. You know what you're signing up for.
Tommy, tell me I'm wrong. You can't. You can't. Every single time, people are shocked. *Shocked!* "My flight's in two hours, how can the line be this long?!" C'mon, boss. Don't do that. That's not a mistake… that's a lifestyle. That's a "future me" problem that *you* created! You want the truth or the version that makes you feel better? Because the truth is, you knew. You knew!
I'm not judging. I'm observing. And what I'm observing is a whole lot of folks who think they're special and the rules of the world's busiest airport don't apply to them. That's crazy… but it's also you. We're starting Monday. For real. Early. And by "we," I mean everyone flying out of Atlanta. Get to the airport. No, earlier than that. Bring a tent. Bring a sleeping bag. Pack a lunch. You see what I'm saying though? It's not a wait; it's a social experiment. And you're all the subjects. Hit the button. HIT the button!