Alright, listen—listen—LISTEN. I’m seeing "5g" trending. Again. Seriously? Tommy, you still falling for this? Every time I see "5g" I just hear that old-school dial-up sound in my head. Like, *zzzzzzzt-crackle-beep-boop-boop*. And then I remember it's 2024 and people are still out here talking about… what? Faster downloads of cat videos? C'mon, boss. Don't do that.
Briana, I know you just told everyone to face their fears, but my fear is that we’re still having the "5g" conversation. It’s like we're perpetually on the cusp of some technological revolution that never quite arrives, you see what I’m saying though? It's always "next year, next year!" This isn't a mistake, that's a lifestyle. That's the *5g lifestyle*. We're starting Monday. For real. Don’t look at me like that, I mean it!
Honestly, all this chatter about "5g" and I’m still waiting for my smart fridge to actually order groceries *before* I run out of milk, not just *tell* me I ran out of milk. We got a nominee. We got a strong nominee for today's Dumb Sh*t Award. Hit the button. HIT the button.