Alright, listen—listen—LISTEN. I'm seeing this "missing scientists 2026" trending, and it’s like, what are we even doing here, people? Missing scientists? Again? C'mon, boss. Don't do that. That's not a mistake... that's a lifestyle at this point! Are we talking about scientists who are just *really* into their work and forgot to tell anyone they went off-grid to, like, discover a new dimension in their basement? Or are we talking full-on Scooby-Doo mystery, where they've been taken by the ghost of a disgruntled former colleague?
I'm not judging. I'm observing. And what I'm observing is that every year, it's something. Like, do these scientists not have a group chat? A shared calendar? A "hey, just popping out to discover cold fusion, be back by dinner" note on the fridge? Tommy, tell me, does the lab not have a sign-out sheet? This is basic stuff! Maybe it’s not that they're missing, maybe they're just *really* bad at communicating. That's a 'future me' problem for their next of kin, I guess. You see what I'm saying though? We need to get these folks some better administrative support, or at least a tracking device. For science!