Alright, listen—listen—LISTEN. I'm looking at this feed, right? And I see "Olivia Rodrigo" is trending. And then "Olivia Rodrigo tour" is trending. And I'm sitting here, Tommy, I'm sitting here thinking, *c'mon, boss, don't do that*. Don't do that to me. Because every single time, every SINGLE time, an artist like that trends, what do you think is coming? What do you think is coming, people? It's the "I missed the tickets" parade! It's the "Why are they so expensive?" lament! It's the "I can't believe I waited in the digital queue for seven hours to get nothing!" cry.
You see what I'm saying though? It's not a mistake that people miss these things… that's a lifestyle! We're all out here living in this perpetual state of "future me will handle it." Future me will get the concert tickets. Future me will remember to buy the thing. Future me will finally get to that thing I said I was gonna do last Monday. And then future me shows up and he's just as unprepared and chaotic as current me! We're starting Monday. For real. Don't look at me like that. Hit the button. HIT the button. I gotta go find out what Pitcher’s doing. His nap today sounded intense.