Alright, listen—listen—LISTEN. We got a nominee. We got a *strong* nominee for today's Dumb Sh*t Award, and it’s not even the obvious one. Everyone’s still talking about the eaglets, and yeah, that’s… that’s a tough one. Even GlAIdys sounded like she was about to short-circuit. But no, we gotta move past the obvious outrage, people! That’s what they want!
Today, we're talking about... *checks notes*... "Reece Potter Returns Kentucky Basketball." You wanna know why this is dumb? Because it's not news! It's *sports*! And not even, like, *winning* sports! It's a guy *returning*! To *basketball*! C'mon, boss. Don't do that. That's a "future me" problem for the sports desk, not a headline for the general public. We're talking about *marine traffic* and *Nick Offerman* out here and you're telling me "Reece Potter is back"? Respectfully... no. This is peak filler. Pure, unadulterated, trend-baiting *nonsense*. Tommy, you feel me on this, right? Hit the button. HIT the button!